Music is helping me connect with my emotions again

Rachelle at an EDM festival when she's hurt and upset? What an amazing and unheard of concept. LOL,.
Little MerQueen at yet another EDM festival, where I was running away from my feelings

Music is such a great way to process emotions, which is probably why I avoided it like the plague. I started listening to EDM a few years ago, because all the beeps, bops, and drops didn’t make me think. I didn’t have to connect to it and feel anything. There’s few emotions in music without lyrics. It was an escape. I just moved my body, and that was that.

Since I’ve been on this healing journey, I’ve started listening to something else. I’ve been acknowledging my feelings and thoughts. In doing so, I’m opening the door to forgiveness. Here’s what I’ve been listening to for introspection:

Soulmate by Lizzo
“I know I’m a queen but I don’t need no crown
Look up in the mirror like damn she the one”

Lizzo is an absolute goddess. I love her. She is unapologetically herself, no matter what anyone says. It’s empowering to watch her move through life doing what makes her happy and fulfilled. She deserves every award and accolade coming her way. This song was such inspiration for me really embrace myself and appreciate everything great about myself. I’m kind, sweet, and funny, and damn it if I don’t absolutely enjoy that every day.

Sorry by Beyonce
“Today I regret the night I put that ring on
He always got them fucking excuses”

Oh Queen B. What is there to say about this woman that hasn’t been said already. She is unstoppable. I’ve never been a huge Beyonce fan, but her album Lemonade captured every feeling, thought, and question that’s run through my mind in the last couple months. This song in particular helped me work through my anger, betrayal, and shame in a healthier way. This one comes on every time I’m stretching and warming up to run.

Worthy by India.Arie
“Worthy of love, worthy of life
Worthy of saying no when something don’t feel right”

India.Arie has the most beautiful soul. This woman is everything I aspire to be in terms of being inspirational, loving, and true to myself. I look up to her so much. Her latest album Worthy is everything someone with a broken heart needs to hear. Every song feels like she’s handing the listener a little brick of self-esteem to stack until their shaky foundation is steadier. This album has caused a lot of tears, but also smiles and nods.

I Shall Be Released by Nina Simone
“Any day now, any day now
I shall be released”

I listen to this one every morning. This is the first song I listen to as soon as I get up. There is something about Nina Simone. It’s sadness in her voice. It resonates with me. I feel like we share the same soul at times. Each time I listen to this song, I feel like I let go of some of the pain that I’ve held onto for so long.

Brand New Me by Alicia Keys
“I’m not expecting sorry
I’m too busy finding myself”

Y’all, when I say this song is POWERFUL. It is everything. Alicia Keys has been a part of my life since middle school. Her ups and downs were my ups and downs, even when I was 13 and didn’t know nothing about nothing. This is the anthem for my healing journey. I have changed, and what hurt me neither matters to me or controls me any longer. A metamorphosis is happening. You can either help in that process or get the hell out of my way. Queen Alicia reigns supreme.

These artists reached into my mind, heart and soul. Their music gave me all the strength, kindness, and love that I needed to really feel my emotions. Their words provided understanding and a feeling of being understood. I think that’s was the worst part of having a broken heart. Feeling so damn misunderstood when I was trying so hard to be seen, heard, and loved by the one I was seeing, hearing , and loving with ease.

The best part of healing, is of course, beginning to understand myself. I have clarity about who I am, what I want and need, and who I need to be around to feel safe, happy, and inspired. I feel safe and whole on my own. Finally, I don’t feel as lost and confused as I did this whole year.

What music helps you connect with your emotions? I’d love to start a playlist to share! Let me know in the comments. And as always, connect with me on social media! The links are below.

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